A Ballentine

A Ballentine’s bottle, the Finest, Established in 1827 : Blended&Bottled by George Ballantine&Son Limited Distillers – Dumbarton, Scotland. The smell of a candle stick – I guess vanilla, which I don’t particularly like, but the smell of burned vanilla is very … cozy ? should I say ?

I have never appreciated scotch whiskey at its presumed value. I am more of a beer person. Does that state something about my character ? Maybe the fact that I am more socially inclined, as beer, the way I see it, is a “social drink”, unlike whiskey, which tells more of a story of a solitary man, thinking about politics, philosophy or history. It is absolutely adorable how stereotypes are build in out head and help us understand and interpret reality.

All this started as I wanted to tell you about senses, more like describe what I am seeing, imagining, sometimes wishing for. So, in the scotch and candle stick picture, a beer just appeared, that I’m pouring into a glass, next to my laptop. Vanilla stopped burning, I have to light it again. A cigarette or even better, a cigar wouldn’t be so bad right now, but I’ve quit smoking some time ago, for the second time. It is so weird that I first quit in march, 2006 and until September, 2006 I never, even for a single day stopped wishing just a smoke, a little one, from everybody around me. In January 2007 I decided to stop smoking again and until this day – april, 7^th, 2007 – I never wanted to smoke again. What I wrote earlier about the cigar was just a pattern of thinking, as I heavily smoked when I used to heavily drink alcohol, so, up to this day and forever I believe, I associate drinking with smoking.

Anyways, this Heineken is delicious.

I hear an old clock which is counting down the minutes, my minutes, my time, my life. Slowly passing – tic, tac, tic, tac -. Now I’m just wondering who invented “tic – tac” and I am trying to hear whether the sound is “tic – tic” or “tac – tac”. I mean, who says it is named tic-tac ? Why ? I can’t set aside my brain and hear anything else but tic-tac, as the synapse behind that sound is stronger than any openness I might show to hearing anything else. We think we use our ears for hearing, but, in fact, we only hear with our brain.

So, what’s next ? Some oranges, kiwi and apples. Why are fruits “cooler” than vegetables ? Don’t you think so ? I am always delighted to taste some fruits, always buying fruits. With vegetables, there’s another story. Sometimes I feel like them, sometimes I don’t. Most of the times I eat vegetable salad, which becomes a sort of fruit, as I make it really sour. Boiled vegetables are totally tasteless and … how should I put it ? I imagine they are actually very tired from all that boiling and are no longer capable of anything else, like being eaten.

A coffee maker is the most beautiful thing that ever existed. And I never drink coffee, so this statement is not made from a coffee addict. Instead, I love the smell. The smell of a fresh made coffee is heavenly, I have to give you that. Of course, I hate bitter and that is why coffee is out of my lead, but I would like to date a coffee drinker, so I can get close to the face, the lips and gently smell the coffee of a man’s skin.

The silence in this room is so strange. Coming home from the big city is always interesting. People are moving slower, so I am moving slower, time is passing, I mean one becomes actually aware of the time passing, the day is longer, you can do so many things, yet there isn’t so much to do. Today I was walking on the street, really walking, which I haven’t done in a while, I had the patience for the traffic light to turn green and in a few seconds after that I crossed the street. In the big city that gesture is unthinkable, that could cost you a bus or an underground leaving. It is so nice to not depend on public/personal transportation, but just be in a small town where you can walk from and to just about anywhere.

My picture as a baby is hanging on the wall besides me. I am looking at it as if it were any kid on the street. I don’t remember taking it, even my parents say that I was pretty upset I had to sit on a stupid chair and look pretty for a stupid picture. So, I have a big grim on my face, like I want to beat up somebody, or … thinking to my mom “we will talk about this at home”.

I’m getting sleepy, I’m going to get into bed, cuddle into my boyfriends arms and thank god I am so lucky to have him.

So, this one goes to Ballentine’s for excellent branding and my boyfriend for excellent taste. Big smile and good night !

Written today, april, 7^th 2007.