Why do I have this compulsion?

I am asking myself why? Why do I need to fix things? Why do I need to solve puzzles? Why do I need to help people?

Why do I have this compulsion?

Some might pshychoanalyse this ... which of course I am trying to do. Psychoanalyse myself...

But, at the end of the day... I understood last night one thing... I fell in love. I fell in love with this man. This man is not perfect, this man was engaged, this man is far for ideal for me. This man cannot offer me all the things that I wanted after my recent break-up. This man is just a man, but this man made me fall in love with him ireparably and irreveersibly.

When I look at him, I am just perplexed. When I am around him, I have nothing in my brain. When he smiles to me, I melt. When he touches my face, when he strokes my face, I feel like I could just die in that moment and all would be worth it. When I am around him, all rational thinking goes to waste. When he kisses me, when I feel his smell, his taste, his feromones.... it's all over. I am swept away and carried into the clouds.

I fell in love. And when you love someone, that's what you want to do. You want to help them, you want to be there for them. You want to support them. You want them to be happy and you put your happiness below theirs. You become second and this is what love is. Your needs are fulfilled just by being around this person. This is amazing. This is nothing short of a miracle. How powerful and immense love is. How Godly in it's power it is. It can move mountains. It can't just move them, it can make them disappear. It can make them obsolote with a stroke of a paintbrush.

How sad love is because it never lasts....