Not even right on the day, but a day before I have been taken to this magnificent place - a sky bar in London. The experience itself is amazing cause I wan even aware that such places exist in London.
The first time I went to a sky bar was New York and loved it. I love being up high, with all the tall buildings and the different perspective on life heights give you. How small and insignificant certain things are.
And I always think back with great fondness of my New York experience but bung able to experience something similar in London was so good.
More so, if you are taken there by your ex-boyfriend who I always pointed out to that he never takes me to anywhere and I don't feel like I am experiencing life like I should be. With great atmosphere and amazing 360views I London, I was able to be honest with him for the first time in my life.
It was liberating. And his kind words and support, understanding and forgiveness were probably the biggest surprise. Here I was, admitting to several episodes of cheating in him when we first started going out, but, just to top it up, cheating also the weekend before.
It felt good to just be able to tell the truth and not be judged and treated like I expected : like a cheating, lying bastard girl that I am. It was amazing to get such a kindly human reaction and whatever the motives behind that reaction (I mean the guy just wants to get back together ) it doesn't make those moments less magic than they were.
It made me feel humble, more humble than I've ever really been in my life. I felt humble at this amazing man's power. At how strong he was in those moments that I can only describe as pure despair (to look the man you love in the face and tell him you've slept with another man).
And that's how I've learnt that power comes in such various shapes and forms. I have mental power. I can punch though mountains if I need to or set my mind to it. I thought he was weak, but that night he showed me he was strong in ways I can't even aspire to reach. In this soul-heightening way that makes no rational sense to me and that's why is so beautiful and so magic.
This is why, I would like to thank you my love for having the power to forgive me when I fall short of my own power to ever forgive myself.
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