When you get repeated complaints from guys that you're not showing any interest, such as "[...] I don't feel you're as into me physically/sexually as I am into you; I'd rather be with a partner I felt was more attracted to me [...]" then maybe it's time to re-consider if, in fact, you are ready for dating.
In reality, you find these guys quite good looking and attractive - in theory, they tick all the boxes. But there's something stopping you to pounce on them, be highly flirtatious and/or show them any kind of interest.
What is it that's stopping you? I'm not entirely sure. I just feel very shy, very reserved and very closed off. I've always had massive issues opening up emotionally and I've never been very good at it. But this is also physically manifesting now because despite the fact that I can see and feel that these men are highly attractive, I just cannot act upon it. There is just nothing there inside me making me act on impulse. I'm all closed off, locked away and massively unavailable to show anything.
I'm pushing them away. I feel awkward at every single touch. I always keep my appropriate 1 yard distance of personal space. I just don't know how to be around strangers.
I have never dated properly. So I am really struggling being open to all these strangers. Because I know that none of them will stick - so what's the point of opening up anyway? And there is nothing to open up. Everything in my heart and soul is frozen.
Maybe my break-up with P has left deeper scars that haven't healed yet. And no matter how much I try to be with these people, no matter how pleasant everything really is, I am simply not able to open up and be myself.
ok, so maybe I'm not that ready for finding another relationship as I thought I am.
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